Friday, April 29, 2011

3D

(This is her mouth open, tongue half way out and her little arms around her face)

This was a picture from our last specialist appointment.  I kept saying this is my miracle girl and the Lord continues to bless with that each appointment.  The specialist said we officially HYDROPS FREE!!!!  Then the cardiologist said that the small hole in her heart that he saw, has closed up so we are now VSD FREE!!!!!!  As far as we can tell she still has the hygroma on the back of her head, but because she is getting bigger, it is harder for us to see her neck.  She is a mover and shaker for sure.  Brent was able to feel her move for the first time last week (which he said "is cool and weird!)  He has not been patient enough to feel her again, not that he its take much because she loves to kick as soon as I lay down as night!  It's so sweet!

Thanks so very much for continued prayers for total healing!  It's been hard for me to not let my heart just expect the total miracle.  At the same time I am still guarded that she may have Turners or some other type of chromosome problem.  No matter what happens, I know for sure how loved Avery Grayce is for sure!  Not just by me, or by our families but by so many people.  One of my favorite moments last week was when two sweet kids that I love climbed into my lap and asked to see Avery.  I told them both (they are 2 and 3) that she is not here yet.  They asked for me to open my mouth so they could see if they could find her!  Wish it was that easy.

Wednesday, April 06, 2011

Finally an Update ( I know I know)

Man I am not good at keeping up this blog lately.  I am so crazy during the day and when I am not busy, I am trying to rest and stay off my feet!  As always, I will try to get better.

So the latest with Avery is that she continues to constantly improve.  Our last visit to the specialist, I anticipated being told that regardless of what the other doctors see, they some how always see the worst of the situation.  Well this time we were excited to hear that the doctor didn't see any hydrops.  He said he saw something on her belly, but if he hadn't seen our history, he would have looked over it.  So, he told us not to be concerned at all!  What an exciting day that was.  We will be going to the specialist every other week at this point.  Which is the same schedule that we are on with our OB. 

I am finally getting excited about her coming.  It is finally seeming real.  But, there have been so many days that I am just exhausted from lack of sleep at night (because I am uncomfortable).  It's those days that I am not rational.  Today was one of those days.  I woke up around 3 to run to the bathroom. As much as I hate to really wake up to go to the bathroom, but fears always take over and I have to turn the light on to make sure that everything is okay (no bleeding or anything strange).  Last night I was shocked to find a huge spider in Brent's sink.  I yelled for Brent and made him wake up to kill the spider!  After that, sleep didn't come easy.  Emotionally I broke down today and told Brent and I just didn't think I would be able to make it through this if something was to happen to Avery.  I am sure it was the lack of sleep talking, but at the same time, that is the raw emotions of this journey. The fear each day of is she moving enough, is everything that I feel normal, will we really make it to at least 34 weeks or longer.  Each time we are reassured that all is looking better, I just have a hard time trusting that anyone can really give that to me.  That is when my faith meets my heart and I know that I have to trust the Lord's plan! 

So for today, besides being super grumpy, tired and a little overwhelmed from the busy client schedule I have been keeping, I can say all is well with my soul!